7 Months of Hell
by SnickersCarWashMMs
Summary: Nick gets some bad news, how will he explain to his beautiful wife, Sara or his 5 year old daughter that 'Til death do us part' will be sooner than any of them expected. M just to be safe, maybe in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I have many stories that I haven't wrote or uploaded onto FF and this is one of them. Yes I finally decided to get of my couch and write something. **

**Summary: Nick gets some bad news, how will he explain to his beautiful wife, Sara or his 5 year old daughter that 'Til death do us part' will be sooner than any of them expected.**

_Nick/Sara -Snickers_

Terminal? _Terminal? _**Terminal.**

"There must be some sort of mistake." The doctor shook his head regretfully. "I wish their was, but no mistake."  
This can't be right. Im 39 years old, happily married with a beautiful daugher. She's gonna be five at the end of this year, what if I don't make it? What if I can't wish my wife a happy birthday or tell her I love her on our wedding anniversary?

"How long have I got?" The doctor looked down at his results. "Well, the biopsy showed that it was in the skin and you said you'd been coughing alot, so we took a tissue sample from your lungs and it showed TLC- Terminal Lymphatic Cancer. It looks quite developed, I would say around 7 months to a year. Im sorry Mr. Stokes." Tears sprung in his eyes, what do I do?  
"Can it be treated?" Again the doctor shook his head. "But the syptoms can be reduced with radiation."

"Sure, when will that start?" The doctor adjusted his glasses. "Well as soon as possible, I will get the nurse to book you an appointment, and she will send a card through the post with the date on it. If you can't make the date just call us up." They both stood and shook hands. "Thanks doc." He muttered and walked out his and office, out the reception into the car park.

Why was he thanking him? He had just told him he was going to die. Tears welled up in his eyes. What was he ment to do? He has a life, a good life, why are they taking that away from him?! Although he had no idea who they were it felt better that he could blame someone.

He unlocked his car and jumped in. He tried to fasten his seatbelt but his hands were shaking, he struggled for a few more moments before flinging it off him and hitting the steering wheel in anger and frustration. He breathed deep but it got caught in his throat and the tears began to spill down his face.

Over and over again he muttered, 'This can't be happening', but deep down he knew this was real and he needs to recognise that not only for himself but for his family.  
After he composed himself, he drove himself home and parked in his drive. He jumped up to the door, he could see his wife in the kitchen, she looked up and waved. He waved back frowning slightly, trying to force a smile but the tears springing in his made it hard.

He walked through the door and saw his wife doing to dishes, this was gonna be harder than he thought.  
She looked over her shoulder and smiled. "Hey honey." He blinked back the tears. "Hey." He whispered hoarsly.  
"There's something I need to tell you. Something that happened today." He continued, walking slowly towards her. She placed the last dish in the sink and turned to him, noting his serious expression and puffy eyes. "Okay." She said slowly and leaned against the side, drying her hands with the teatowel. "What's wrong, Nick? Did something happen at the doctors?"

He slowly began to tell her what he had been told, both oblivious to the 5 year old that had wondered out of her room.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: It isn't so good so far but im trying, eh? Lol.**

**POV**

I had been happy colouring a frog red until I heard the door shut, I knew Daddy was home. I missed him, Mummy said that he wasn't feeling well and went to the doctors, she said that he would make him better. I had smiled and told her I would draw him a picture of us at the park, she told me that he would love it.

I picked up the picture I drew of us and slowly began to walk out into the front room, I saw Mummy and Daddy talking about something. Mummy said it was rude to interupt when grown ups were talking and that I should wait, so I did.

I could hear them saying stuff like, 'TLC?', whatever that meaned, 'He said I've got 7 months left', after that I saw Mummies eyebrows raise and tears fall from her eyes. She turned back to the dishes, effectively turning her back on Daddy. He called out her name and touched her back. She flinched and knocked a cup on the floor, startling me.

She bent down to pick up the pieces, tucking her hair behind her ears nervously as he bent down to help her. "Can you get me the brush?" She asked but he just stood there. Out of anger, she through the piece she had in her hand, it hit the ground and flicked a piece back into her hand. I saw red stuff drop from her hand, it was scary but I was worried she was gonna hurt herself more when she started picking up the pieces again.  
"Sara?" I heard him whisper as he grabbed her wrist to stop her picking up the pieces. She looked up and stared into his eyes, shaking her head slightly and he stared back with the same tear filled chocolate eyes. "Tell me its not real. Tell me this is worst possible joke ever. Tell me that you love me and your gonna be here forever." He didn't say anything, he pulled her into a hug mindfall of her hand and fell on the floor with her in his lap. Both crying.

I don't like it when they cry, I wanted to hug Mummy and Daddy.

"Mummy?" I whispered.  
They both looked up shocked and startled. "Why are you crying?" They stood and wiped at their tears, Daddy trying to walk towards me but Mummy and stopped him and bent down infront of me.  
"Its nothing, honey, me and Daddy are fine. What have you got there?" She asked me pointing to my hands. "Its my picture of you, me and Daddy." I smiled at her and daddy. She took it from my hands and smiled, ruffling my hair. "Its really pretty, don't you think so, honey?" Daddy walked over and smiled too. "Its great, sweetheart." He bent down to ruffle my hair also but Mummy shook her head. I turned to Daddy. "Where are you going in 7 months?"

They both froze. "Nowhere sweetie, I'm not going anywhere, ok?" I nodded. "But why were you crying?" Mummy stroked my face. "We were just upset that I had hurt my hand. Now why dont you go colour in your colouring book, Mummy and Daddy need to talk." I turned around, a little upset and confused. As I walked into my room I could just make out Mummy saying 'Why the hell did you tell her that?!'.

It was my fault that Mummy and Daddy are mad, I did that, I made them mad. I crawled into my bed and cryed.

**Okay it would be nice if you reviewed. )**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 of 7 Months of Hell

_Previously_

_"Why did you tell her that?"_

"What do you mean, why did I tell her that?!"

"I was protecting her. What did you want me to tell her that im dying and I wont be around for much longer?!" He shouted at her not expecting tears to roll down her face.

She looked down at her ajoined hands and nodded. "No, I guess your right." She whispered with a watery smile. She turned around and walked towards the hall before she heard him call her. "Where are you going?"

She motioned for the mess on the floor. "I need to get a dustpan and brush to clean up the mess."

With that she turned on her heel and headed down the hallway. Opening a closet, she heard distinct crying sounds coming from her daughters room.

Slowly making her way down there, the crys got louder, cautiously she opened the door and peaked her head in.

"Honey?" She heard sniffling from under the covers, she walked over to her and sat on the bed next to her. "Whats wrong, honey?" She pulled the covers down and brushed some of her hair out of her face, only to have her roll over, away from her and pull the covers back up, more tears falling.

"Its my fault. I made you and Daddy sad." Sara barely made out what she said as it was muffled by the sheets and quilt. "What are you talking about?" She pulled the covers from over her head and frowned at her.

"When you were crying, it was my fault, I shouldn't have interupted..." Sara couldn't understand a word after that, apparantly little Hannah Stokes had inherited her mothers incoherant babbling.

Sara slipped under the covers with her daughter, tucked a curl behind her ear and kissed her forehead. "Honey, Shhhhh. It wasn't and will NEVER be your fault, okay? You understand me? Me and Daddy had found out some bad news."

Hannah buried her head in her mothers neck and played with the locket that hung around her neck. "What bad news?" Sara paused for a moment. "Daddy's sick."

Her daughter frowned again. "But you said that he went to the doctors and he would make Daddy better, why isn't he better?" Sara sniffled, tucking her daughters head under hers and smoothing her hair, the tears began to fall again.

"Sometimes..." She choked on a sob, "Sometimes, people get sick and there's nothing the doctor can do." "What does that mean, wont he get better?"

Sara shook her head. "When people can't be made better they go away for a really long time but you have to remember they still love you, ok?" Hannah looked at her mother before trying to wipe away her tears.

"Don't worry Mummy, I know Daddy will come back for us, he loves us. He told me and he said he love us more than candy floss." Sara stroked her curls and had to smile at her perfect innocence, her love and how wise someone so young could be. "More than candy floss, eh? Well we love him too, dont we?"

She tickled her little stomach and smiled as she giggled. "Yes...mummy...we do." She half giggled, half said to her mother.

Sara was glad that she had her daughter with her to help her through this, but also feeling guilty that she wanted her daughter to go through something like this, she fell asleep with her arms wrapped around her daughter hoping that they could wake up and her husband would be making pancakes, healthy as ever.

Nick sat on the couch, wondering what he was gonna do, wondering what he was ment to do. Never in his life would he imagine his life would take a turn like this, he also hoped, dreamed that he and Sara could grow old together and watch their grandchildren grow up.

He had no idea what he was ment to feel, if he was ment to be upset because his life was over, no he couldn't he had everything in his life he could wish for, not everybody had a family and great friends. Was he ment to be angry? Angry that his life was being taken away from him, that one day he wasn't allowed to wake up and kiss his wife goodmorning or angry that his wife was angry and upset with him.

He knew she was shocked but he was upset too. _I guess I have to give it time, then we can savour those last few memories, _He thought. Vibrations brought him out of his reverie, he pulled out his phone and answered it. "Stokes." He answered almost choking up. "Hey Nicky, its Cath, are you ok?"

He wiped away his tears and cleared his throat. "Yeh, Im good Cath, is everything okay?" She stood in the breakroom with Warrick, Greg and Grissom. "Er..No, sorry to call you like this but do you mind coming back in tonight? I know your tired but something has come up."

He shook his head, but realising she couldn't see him, he spoke up. "No I don't mind, Cath. I'll be there soon beside's I need to tell you all something." She smiled into the phone. "Take as long as you need, after all we're not that desperate."

They both laughed and said their goodbyes. He stood and walked down the hallway wondering where his wife was. He looked in the bathroom, their bedroom and the spareroom; incase they wanted to try for their second child, before heading into his childs room.

Peaking in he notice they were both sleeping, he could still see the tear stains on both their faces. He bowed his head, there was gonna be a lot more tears and it was all because of him.

He creeped in as quiet as possible, before shaking Sara gently. "Hmmm?" She mumbled, her eyes still closed. "I need to go to work, I love you." He kissed her, noticing her eyes were open, he wiped at them. "Goodbye." Noting the fear in her eyes, he kissed her again. "I'll be back, I promise."

She closed her eyes, choosing not to acknowledge his last comment. He made his back into the kitchen feeling slightly better but still upset, deciding to write a note explaining he had to go to work in case she forgot and left for work.

CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI **Later on back at the lab.** CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI

Nick walked through the coridoors of the lab and into the breakroom where everyone apart from Sara was settled. "Whats going on?" He asked them. "There was a kidnapping of two college students and we need all hands on deck. We'll call Sara in later as its her day off." Nick almost teared up at the thought of his family at home.

"But we all just got off, what about day shift?" Grissom shrugged. "There all tapped out." Nick nodded. "There's something I wanna tell you guys." Catherine practically squeeled. "Is Sara pregnant again?" Nick shook his head and felt the tears burning in his eyes.

"Im sick. Real sick." Everyone stared at him in silence. "How sick? What is it?" Warrick asked his voice thick with emotion. "Its TLC and apparantly very sick." Grissom went through every illness that he knew of mentally until he figured it out. "Terminal Lymphatic Cancer, its in the skin. Did you the doctors tell you what you can do and how long you've got left?" Nick nodded again.

"They say with or without the radiation i've got around 7 month left." Catherine had tears rolling down her face. "Does Sara know?" Everyone watched regretfully as he slowly nodded his head. "Yeah." He whispered.

"How did she take it?" Nick shrugged. "I dont know. She won't talk to me." Catherine stood to give him a hug. "Don't worry, i'm sure she'll come round." She whispered in his ear. "Dont worry?! I'm dying! My wife wont talk to me and I can't get the image of my daughter crying out of my mind!" Catherine backed away and frowned. "Im sorry." He gradually said.

He ran his hand over his face and took a seat next to a silent Greg, who hadn't said a thing. "Can we just start the case." Grissom looked over the members of his team and trying to be strong he stood and told them the details of the case.

As everyone left the breakroom to get a start on there jobs, Grissom called Nick into his office.

Grissom took a seat and motioned for Nick to take one too. He shook his head. "No, I can stand. What is it Griss?"

"Well, I was thinking. Maybe you should take some time off, spend time with your family, go back to Texas or just take some time to come to terms with your condition."

"I don't want to take some time off. I wanna work." Grissom shuffled through some papers. "Nick you can't just jump back into work after learning something like this besides what about your family at home or in Texas, does Mr and Mrs Stokes know?" Nick shook his head and collapsed into a seat.

"I guess your right. How long?" He rested his head in his hands. "Take as long as you need. Just give me a call when your ready to come back and tell Sara that today is her last shift." Nick looked up shocked. "You sure? I mean your gonna be short handed." Smiling slightly Grissom looked at him solemly.

"Your not the only one hurting besides, you and her have been working your asses off. You deserve a break." Nick stood and walked to the door before turning to look at him. "Thanks." He said. "It might be my last break." He muttered as he walked out.

He drove in silence home, wondering what he was gonna come home too.

He parked the car in the drive, jumped out and slowly walked up the drive to the door. He stood outside the door for a few moments before slowly opening the door and walking in.

He saw his wife in the kitchen, in an chocolate and flour covered apron laughing at her daughter who was sat on the side also covered in chocolate and laughing. At hearing someone they both looked up and saw Nick stood there. "Hey." He said, hoping his wife will talk to him, she nodded to him and Hannah jumped off the side and ran into his arms.

"Dadddddyyyy!" She squeeled. "Hey princess, what have you been doing?" He wiped some of the chocolate from her chin and kissed her forehead. "Me and mummy were making cookies for you." She said and beamed up at him. "You were?! Thank you, why don't you go wash your hands and face."

He placed her back on the ground and she ran down the hallway and into the bathroom. He slowly walked to where his wife was wiping the side with a cloth. "Hey." She whispered. "Hey." He tucked a stubborn curl behind her ear, trailing his hand down her chin and turning her face to look at him.

He placed a gentle, meaningful kiss on her lips, at first she didn't respond but after a few seconds she gave in. He pulled away and rested his forehead against her. "Im sorry." She finally said. He shook his head slightly. "You have nothing to be sorry for. This is a shock for all of us but we're gonna get through this."

She closed her eyes as she felt the tears escaping her eyes. "How can you say that? This isn't just a rough patch that we're gonna work through. Nick..." She choked on a sob. "Your...your dying." She said in hushed whisper.

He wrapped his arms around her and whispered soothing words in her ear as she cried into his chest. "Listen." He said as her crying died down. "Grissom said we can both have time off." She was silent for a moment. "Really?" He placed his head over hers and rubbed his hand soothingly up her back. "Yeah, todays your last shift. So I was thinking we could go down to Texas, see my parents."

She pulled away to wipe at her tears and nodded. "I think that would be a good idea, when are we gonna leave?" He turned his head to look at the calender and then looked back at her. "If I get a flight for a couple of hours after your shift, you could sleep on the flight and when we get there. But can you promise me one thing." She just stared at him. "Promise me that you'll talk to me, tell me how your feeling. Please, I need you." She could see the desperation in his eyes and nodded.

"I promise. Its just...I don't know...what to feel." He could see the tears springing in her eyes again. "I feel the same, its just so sudden....I just...I don't know what to do." She ran her hands up his chest and around his neck. He leaned his head against hers and closed his eyes, letting out a deep sigh.

He dipped his head and kissed her softly on the lips. She opened her mouth and deepened the kiss, the hunger and need coming from her was addicting. He pushed her into the side while his hands found her hips. She ran her hands down his chest and slipped under his shirt, feeling his amazing abs.

He moaned into the kiss before pulling away and kissing over her jawline and neck. His hands slipped up her shirt, massaging her soft skin. Possesively he claimed her lips again, her lips molding against his in the most delectable way.

"MUMMMMY!" They pulled away hearing their daughters screams and both automatically looked to see if Hannah was there. "What is it, honey?" Her mother asked as she saw her daughter stomp out, pouting. "I've got shoclate in my hairrr!" Her parents grinned but immediantly frowned when they heard Sara's phone chirping. Looking down at the screen, "I guess my last shift is gonna be sooner than we thought."

He smiled slightly. "I'll get everything sorted for when you get back, okay?" She nodded but there attention to one another was stolen by there daughter when she made a huge 'humph' noise signalling she was still there. "What about me, mummy?" Sara grinned. "I got her. Go honey." He interupted.

 She gave him one last kiss before opening the phone and walking down the hallway, past her daughter to ruffle her hair and into the bedroom bathroom to clean up.

Hannah looked at her father expectantly, her arms crossed. He smirked at how much she was like her mother. "Come on, lets get you cleaned up." He walked her down to the other bathroom. Sara popped her head in to say goodbye and a few minutes later the door slamming shut could be heard.

He looked down at his soap covered daughter splashing around in the bath with a duck and smiled. "Looks like it me and you kiddo." She giggled. "Good, daddy. I missed you." He leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. "Guess what?" She wiped some soap of her face. "What?" He splashed her with some water. "We're gonna go on a trip to see Grandma and Grandpa."

She looked up at him, grinning a smile she inherited from her mother with the gap. "Really? Just you, me and mummy?!" She grabbed his face with her wet, soapy hands and kissed his cheeks repeatidly. "I love you Daddy." He shook his head in a poor attempt to get the soap of his face. "I love you too. Now come on, lets get you out this bath." She stood as he grabbed a towel off the side and wrapped it around her. Now im gonna get some clothes, you stay here."

She grinned cheekily and nodded. When he left the room, she jumped out the bath, the towel pooling at her feet and ran out the bathroom.  
Just as Nick was about to walk into Hannah's bedroom, he heard giggling from behind him. Shaking his head, he knew she was up to something. "Hannah, I hope your not out the bathroom." Suddenly wet foot steps pelted through the house and Hannah ran past him, butt naked.

Grinning he chased her. "You get here, you munchkin." These were certainly the days he was going to miss the most.

**Review. You know you really want too. Please, im getting worried that nobody actually is alive on this planet.**


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